Past The Point of No Return.

Sometimes I am oblivious.

I am ignorant, in a bubble.

I do not see how bad the world is getting.

Sometimes I am sleepy.

Tired of everything.

Wasting the days away with dreams.

But Sometimes I am shocked.

Back into reality that scares me.

Back into a world of crazy.

Sometimes I wonder.

What kind of a world my children will grow up in.

If I am ever brave enough to have them in the first place.

Sometimes I think it will all be okay.

It is, after all, a bad day.

Not a bad life.

Sometimes a tragedy comes our way.

Whether it be completely personal.

Or country and world wide.

And then all of a sudden.

The world just stops turning.

And everyone thinks a lot.

Everyone thinks about how precious life is.

And what they need to do to change.

And how they can live more.

Everyone cries a lot.

Everyone watches the news a lot.

And then they cry some more.

I sit here in my bed wide awake.

The time is 12:34.

And I try to figure out the world.

I try to summon the courage I will need.

The courage to simply go on.

Because I am scared just like everyone else.

Although we all deal with tragedy in different ways.

One thing remains the same.

We are all completely terrified.

No denying it.

You could be Chuck Norris for all I care.

I know you're just as scared as I am.

Because the world is insane.

The world is spinning out of control.

The world is tearing its self apart.

And there is nothing anyone can do about it.

There was a time when we could have fixed it.
There was a time when we could have glued the world back to gether.

But I fear we have reached the point of no return.

I fear we have become oil and water.

I fear there is no way to fix what has been broken.

I am okay though.

I am strong.

I know that this is how it has to be.

I fear it will only get worse before it gets better.

I fear my children will not live past the age of 5.

I fear that there will be another world war.

I am okay though.

I am strong.

I know that this is how it has to be.

I think it is easy for us to slip into oblivion.

To become ignorant and ignore the world.

But we cannot have this luxury any more.

We cannot afford to ignore the problems.

We cannot afford to forget what happened.

We don't have a choice. 

If we forget, if we drift off into oblivion and ignorance.

If we give up, and say the war is just too hard to keep on fighting.

If we come to a point where we are so war driven and hate motivated that there is nothing left to fight for.

Then surely we have failed.

Surely we have lost the battle.
Surely we have ruined the world.

I don't want to be a failure.
I don't want to loose this battle.
I don't want to ruined the world.

I choose not to be a failure.
I choose not to loose this battle.
I choose not to ruin the world.

I choose to keep on going.
I choose to keep on fighting.
I choose to keep on pushing.

I choose to go on with life.
I choose to keep my head held high.
I choose to live, not just be alive.



What about you?

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30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 30

It's the last day of 30 Days of Thanksgiving! I actually posted every day this month.. holy cow! They say it takes 21 days to make a habit of something. Well... I guess I will  be posting a lot more!

I am thankful for the wonderful life I have. I am thankful that all of you wonderful people are in it! I am thankful for those I have met along the way, and those I have yet to meet. I am thankful for the wonderful experiences I have had, and those I will have in the future. Isn't it wonderful to think that some of the best moments of our lives haven't even happened yet? I think it is.

I am thankful that I get to live in this great big world and someday I plan to travel it. Explore it. I wonder about so many things. People say that reading is a wonderful escape from the world. I agree. However I would much rather escape into the world, than away from it. I am thankful that someday I will be able to travel and see and experience the world.

I am thankful that I have great parents and siblings and an amazing extended family. They are amazing. I learn so much from them and I love them all so much!

I am thankful for my amazing friends! They support me through everything and I love all the crazy stuff we do. I mean the list goes on and on!

I am thankful for the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower.

I am thankful for so much stuff! I think I should stop now because If I don't I wont post this by midnight...

Just remember that every day is a gift and if you forget what you are thankful for, you will forget what you are living for.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 29

I'm going to write about how thankful I am for my laptop. Without this wonderful piece of technology (given to my by my wonderful daddy!) I would not be able to write this blog, or work on my soecial project, or do a lot of my homework without it! This thing is like my diary. I know my posterity would probably prefer me write in an actual diary,  but I can type so much faster than I can write! I know I already wrote about how thankful I am for technology, but you're just going to have to deal with that. So deal with it. 

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 28

I am thankful that I got to play Lady MacBeth in Dinner Theatre last year. I know it seems weird, but I learned a very important truth while I had that role. Lady MacBeth has a line that says, "What's done cannot be undone." I feel like I used to worry so much over the past and what I had done wrong and what I could have done. But after being Lady MacBeth I realized that what you have done, is done. You don't get that back. But you can always move on and make today better. 

So basically I am thankful that Mama Loureiro cast me as the psycho chick. :)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 27

I am so incredibly grateful that my mom is an English teacher. And that she's my mom, of course! :) Honestly, if she wasn't my mom I probably wouldn't be able to pull of an A in English. She gives great writing advice, edits all my papers before I turn them in, and she taught me how to write in the first place. I am so grateful for all the other things she does too. :) She fights big battles for me and my siblings all the time and I am so grateful for her! She is the best mom EVER! (And if any one tries to dispute that...well I will see you out by the portables during lunch, buddy.)  She does an amazing job raising 4 kids on her own and I love her so much!

I am so thankful for my mom. :)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 26

I am very grateful that there are only 26 days until Christmas break! However this also means that there are only 26 days until I get my wisdom teeth out as well... Life just happens I suppose. And I am thankful that I have the ability to accept this and move on. And I'm really grateful that Christmas break is in 26 days... Christmas  break = Sleep, and Sleep = Happy Hannah. :)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 25

I am thankful for the TV show The Office. I never get tired of it. It's amazing. It has made my life better. It really has. I love watching it when I'm feeling down because it makes me feel better, and I love watching it when I'm happy because it makes me laugh really hard. And if you aren't laughing, you aren't living.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 24

I am thankful for my wonderful warm house and cozy bed that I get to sleep in every night. I am very fortunate and I think sometimes I forget just how lucky I am. There are so many people all over the world who have so little, yet they are still happy. I hope I can remember this always and be thankful for all that I have always.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 23

I am VERY VERY VERY thankful for Ibuprofen.

End of story.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 22

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! I have so much to be grateful for! I have so many wonderful people and things in my life and I don't know what I would do with out them! I am thankful for YOU!

Today I am going to write about how thankful I am for my World Civilizations class. I have the best time in that class! Some of my best friends are in that class and even though we aren't supposed to talk to each other...we do any ways. And of course when we are talking about (joking about) what we are learning. For example... "Are we talking about Achilles or Ed Sheeran here?" or "Red heads are so hot!"...obviously we like red heads...a lot. ANYWAYS... We have a great time. :)

I also have an amazing teacher. How to describe Mr. Connor I am not sure though... I suppose you could say he is a brilliantly crazy - republican - conspiracy theorist - loud and very funny - teacher. And we all think he's pretty great. He really does teach us a lot and I am really glad he's one of my teachers this year.

I love school this year, and I would like to say to all those Jr. High kids out there.

IT. GETS. BETTER.

I promise:)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 21

I am very thankful for Saturday Night Live. I know what you're thinking, "Why in the heck is this girl thankful for SNL?" Well it's simple. SNL is funny, and really it's brilliant. SNL pokes fun at everything. SNL helps us laugh at ourselves! I mean it's like watching a full hour of funny, ironic, and snarky people (like myself) make everyday situations and news stories hillarious! SNL helps us get a break from reality without telling a fairy tale. SNL helps us to learn to laugh at ourselves and I think that is pretty great. So yes, I am thankful for Saturday Night Live and I have deticated an entire blog post to it. 

Deal with it.

~Hannah 

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 20

So since it's almost thanksgiving... I think it only appropriate to write about how thankful I am, and how much I LOVE, FOOD! :)

Okay, I love food. It is delicious and fun to make. I hate it when people are all like, "I don't eat carbs." or "I don't eat chocolate because it makes me break out." Dang, well more for me I guess! But really, life is too short to not be eating chocolate!! And who cares if you break out!? That is why cover up was invented! Heck, no one really cares about your zit except for you. Okay? Chill. And this "I don't like carbs" thing... People! BREAD IS DELICIOUS! Why on earth wouldn't you eat bread! I mean seriously, eating bread is not going to make you fat. It's not exercising, like me, that makes you fat. :) So EAT THE CHOCOLATE and BREAD! Life is too short not to!

On a more serious note..

I am thankful that I have food to eat while others have none. It makes me sad to think that some poor little child (or adult or anybody for that matter) somewhere doesn't have food to eat. It really breaks my heart. I just wanna feed everyone! Is that too much to ask! I'm pretty sure that if just half of all Americans ate normal sized portions of their food we could take all the food we don't eat and end world hunger. Just a thought. I like to think a lot, have you noticed? :P 

Anyways, I am thankful for food, I am thankful that I even have food to eat, and I love chocolate.

P.S. Really, no one cares if you have a giant red zit on your face...Caring about something that insignificant is a waste of time. Chill out:)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 19

I am very thankful that I know how to write, and that I know how to write well. (Or at least I think I write well...I don't know...) I am thankful that I can write and let it all out in my writing. :) I love writing on my blog and I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I do! Thanks for reading! (Who knows... there might be a HUGE surprise coming ... ;))

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 18

I am very thankful for fuzzy socks. I mean they are just wonderful! They are so cozy and warm and fuzzy and amazing! And to those of you who are reading this thinking, "What the crap is this girl talking about?" I am talking about these: 

These are fuzzy socks and they are my favorite article of clothing ever. I am thankful for their cozy warmth and I don't think I could make it through living in this nasty Utah weather without them. And even when I live in  New York during the summer and California during the winter (When I am rich and have the means to do so that is....) I will still wear them because they are just so wonderful.

I am very thankful for fuzzy socks.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 17

Holy Cow! I can't believe I have made it 17 days and I haven't forgotten once!! It's a miracle!

Anyways. Today I am going to write about how thankful that I don't live in a society like that of The Hunger Games, 1984, or Anthem. I am fairly certain that if I had to live in one of those societies I would probably either die, die trying to get out of there, or end up starting a rebellion and having nightmares for the rest of my life.

I am so immensely thankful that I have the freedom to live where I want and have the career and job I want. I am thankful that I can go to college where ever I want, if I get the grades to do so. I am thankful that I can vote and that the government here in America is at least some what stable. At least more stable than most countries anyways.

And besides... If the nation of Panem were to ever come into existence... I live in Utah where the capitol would be anyways.. So I'm safe! :) That is until someone from New York starts a rebellion with her insanely attractive boyfriend(s)... ;)

But really, in all seriousness I truly am grateful that I have these wonderful freedoms, and I am even more grateful for those men and women who fight for my freedom every day. <3

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 16

I am so thankful for all of my amazing friends! There is no drama in our group and I absolutely love it! I just want them to know how much I love all of them and how thankful I am for them! Growing up with you, partying with you, and just hanging up with you has been and will continue to be a blast. Thank you!

Aida Nubians...

One Direction Concert! June 2012

Last Day of Freshman Year at YogoTogo

Aida Cast Party

Seeing "The Vow" (We all cried like babies... :))

Dinner Theater! Love these people!

More Dinner Theater...

RFG 2011

RFG 2012

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 15

So today I am thankful for...no, not Napoleon Dynamite...Technology! 

Technology has blessed my life in many ways and I love all the great things I can do with it. Like write on my blog! And listen to music, and take pictures to remember the good times, and watch movies (like Napoleon Dynamite) and lets not forget those amazing cell phones! Technology also has helped scientists make new discoveries and medical advances as well. Technology helps us learn new things each day. :) I am grateful  for the many ways that technology has blessed my life and the lives of others.. :)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 14

I am thankful for chocolate.

I think that is pretty self explanatory...

~Hannah ;)

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 13

I am extremely thankful for modern medicine! The blessings of doctors, hospitals, emergency response teams, vaccinations, medication, MRI's, X-rays, etc. hardly exist in some countries and I am so grateful that I have these blessings in my life while others don't. I think sometimes we take these blessings for granted, but I hope we can do more to help those who don't have them and realize ourselves just how luck we are. I truly hope that someday everyone around the world will have access to the blessings I already have.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 12

I am extremely grateful for the wonderful teachers I have in and out of school this year! Though not all of them are wonderful, the ones who are have taught me so much so far this year!

You can't take it with you so learn all you can!

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 11

I am very thankful for my nice warm and cozy house. I hate the cold and snow and it's nice to have a warm place where I can live. I am thankful for the modern technology that helps heat my house and keep it warm all winter long. :)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 10

I am thankful for mistakes.

I always hear people say that they wish they could do something over again. To avoid pain, or fix something they did wrong, or just to get a second chance. And I have to admit, I used to be one of these people, who wants a re-do every time something goes wrong. But now I feel differently. I have realized that all the mistakes we make, and all the hard things we go through, and all the bad things that happen in our lives are really just lessons we need to learn. These experience are just preparing us for something better, even if in the moment we feel hopeless or disappointed in ourselves, we need to remember that everything is going to be okay. Everything that happens to us makes us who we are. We didn't come here to earth to be perfect, we came here to eventually one day become perfect. Practice makes perfect. When you practice something you don't always get it right the first time, or the second time, or even the third time. But eventually you learn how to do something the way it was meant to be done. We have to practice living and learning before we can be perfect. And it's not always easy. However, I have come to realize that all the hard things we have to go through, and all the mistakes we make may seem to be hurting us in the moment, but they aren't. They're helping us learn and become stronger.

I have made many mistakes in my life, and so has everyone else. No on is perfect, and I am thankful for this simple truth. We can't always control what happens to us, but we can control how we let it effect us. We can either be down in the dumps and let these hard things ruin our lives, or we can learn from our experiences and become better and stronger because of them. Life is hard for a reason, if it wasn't hard you wouldn't learn anything. If we had a magical do-over button we could press every time something wen't wrong, what would you learn? NOTHING! And I mean, lets face it, life would be pretty boring if we didn't make any mistakes! Everyone and everything would be perfect and we would be living on a little marshmallow cloud full of rainbows completely oblivious to everything.

Ignorance is bliss you say? I think not. Do you know how many mistakes it took until Thomas Edison invented the light bulb? 3,000. But he also did not consider himself a failure. He had simply found 3,000 ways not to make a light bulb. He LEARNED from his mistakes and now we have the wonderful light bulb, and computers, and heaters for our homes, and a whole lot of other things that we take for granted.

I am thankful for mistakes because without them life would be really boring and lame. I am thankful for mistakes because they help me to become a better person. I am thankful for mistakes because they are blessings from God.

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 9

Today I am thankful for the simple things in live. Just the simple joys that make life better in a big way.

I'm thankful for:

• Books
• Blueberry doughnuts (from Tasty's)
• The Orange Dream Machine at Jamba Juice
• Writing
• When I watch Smallville with my dad
• Harry Potter
• The Hunger Games
• Pixar Movies
• The Office
• Pinterest

And many other things!

Sorry it was short today! I'm SUPER tired. But tomorrow I promise to write a TON more:)

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 8

Today I am thankful for funny people, funny things, and laughter. :) Life without laughter is like cake without icecream or Katniss without Peeta. (Yes, I like Peeta over Gale. Deal with it.)

I think I will stop talking now and just let you laugh. :)

                           

I am thankful for laughter! I hope you laughed a little while going through this post:) See ya tomorrow!

~Hannah

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 7

Today I am thankful for cameras. They allow us to capture a moment in time that can last forever, (As log as you backup your computers...) and help us preserve our history. I love photography and I am pretty much addicted to Instagram (Follow me! @missmusic15). I think it's amazing how you can capture a millisecond of time and keep it forever. So cool! :) I am very thankful that I have so many memories that I will be able to look back on because of the wonderful invention of the camera.

Sorry it was so short today! But i'm tired and sleep trumps everything... :)

~Hannah 

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 6

I'm tired, so I'm just gonna keep this short.

Today I am thankful that the elections are over. Even though I am not exactly thrilled with who won the Presidential election, I still live in America, which is a wonderful blessing. I'm thankful for freedom of speech, and I think I take it for granted too much. Imma work on that. :) 

Anyways, I am too exhausted to continue, I'm just thankful I don't have to watch any political T.V. adds for another 4 years. 

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 5

Today I am thankful for people who are smarter than me. I know this sounds a little weird, but I really am thankful for these people! I'm thankful for the girl that sits next to me in Algebra II Honors, without her I would be totally lost. I am also thankful for my math teacher who comes in at 6:45 in the morning to do math reviews for those of us who need them. Okay I know I have already talked about math a lot, but I am also thankful for the 3 friends I have in my math class. The conversations we have about travel, books, and life in general are really fun and I learn something new from them every day. Everyone has a different outlook on life and I am glad they are willing to share theirs with me, I have thought about things in a completely different way because of them. Thanks guys! :)

I am also thankful for my Seminary teacher, Brother Fereday who knows a heck of a lot more about the gospel than I do. I have learned SO much from him. And That class is just the best. :)

I am thankful for those who have gone before me (especially my family) and teach by their example and experience. Because of them I get to make my own mistakes and learn from them too.

Basically what I'm saying is that I am thankful for those who have taught me throughout my life. I am thankful for those of us who understand something and are willing to share that knowledge with everyone else. Because, lets face it, we all know i'm horrible at math.

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 4

... Describe how I feel about music! I am SO thankful for music and the role it has played in my life this far. I have actually figured that I listen to music more than I don't. Whenever I have money it's either spent on clothes, going to the movies, or music. Usually music. It has changed my life forever! Music is the greatest stress reliever ever created. It is my absolute favorite thing in the entire world. I LOVE IT MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE EVER CREATED!!!

One of the best feelings is when you're sitting alone in your room, with the music blaring as loud as the speakers surrounding you can stand. When the music is blasting towards you from all angles and you really feel the music. It feels like you're floating. That's when I feel infinite. Because music can never be stopped, no force on Earth can contain it. When you let the music wash over you and you can absorb it into your soul. When you can hear every harmony and every instrument. When you can hear and feel the emotion. When you can understand the meaning of not just the lyrics, but the music underneath. That is when you can truly begin to appreciate and start to understand what music is.

Music begins in our bones, it's literally pumping through our blood. With every heart beat we feel the rhythm. This is why no one can hate music. We are music. I believe that music is the energy flow of life. How we feel reflects into the music we make and listen to. Music can change the entire way we think and feel. Even when you're driving in the car, feeling the saddest you have ever felt, if you're favorite song comes on the radio it makes your day better.

One of my favorite memories was when I was in the car with my dad and were in the front and my siblings were in the back and a song would come one the radio and I would start singing along. And if my dad knew it too he would also sing. And we would sing and sing and sing until we got to where we were going. Even though it was something as simple as singing in the car, I loved how it made me feel.

Yesterday I got to hang out with two of my favorite people ever, my cousins Reuben and Jethro. All three of us are very musical and into the performing arts. The only problem is we don't get to see each other very often because we live far away from each other. But when we do get together, we usually eat food while we talk about school etc. And then we find a piano. Jethro can sightread really well and we go through all the songs we can think of. Yesterday we were at our aunt Lydia's house who has an entire bookshelf dedicated to sheet music. Needless to say it was a really good day. We sang a lot of Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables (We all love musical theater, especially Reuben). It's so fun to get to know your cousins through music and I have to give major props to their parents for raising them with good music all around them. I love my family, and I love all the music they expose me to! I mean if it weren't for Reu and J I wouldn't know who Coldplay was! I owe them big time for that!

I am so immensely grateful for music. I know with every fiber of my being (wow...that escalated quickly!) that music is the reason life is wonderful. No matter who you are or where you come from music is the universal language. Everyone can feel the beat and rhythm of life weaving it's way through the notes. And that is why I love it so much. That is why I am so incredibly thankful for music.

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 3

Gotta love Jon Stewart! And he's right. Book are amazing! And I am very thankful for them!

The best, most amazing, totally fabulous, remarkably brilliant, 7 greatest books/series I have ever read in my life (in no particular order) are:

• The Perks of Being a Wallflower - Steven Chbosky
• The Fault in Our Stars - John Green
• To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
• The Giver series - Lois Lowry
• The Book of Mormon
• The Hunger Games series - Suzanne Collins
• Harry Potter series - J.K. Rowling

Firstly I would like to say how thankful I am for those who are brave enough to even publish these books. Writing is NOT an easy thing to do and after putting so much time and heart into something it can't be easy to let just anyone read what you have worked so hard on.

Secondly I just have to say how thankful I am for how much I have learned and experienced from reading and living inside these books. I can't even express how these books have changed my life. There is no way to put into words how I feel. 

I am so thankful for books! They make my life better. I learn so much from them and they have changed my life! Hopefully I can write a book of my own someday and change someone else's life the same way mine has been changed. (Who knows...it could be closer than you think ;))

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 2

Today I am going to write about how grateful I am for my family. :) They are always there for me! Just today I woke up with a headache and by about 8 o'clock it had turned into a full on migraine. NOT FUN. Around lunch I started to have blurry vision in my right eye. Needless to say, I needed to go home. I called my mom but she was in Bountiful so she couldn't come get me. So I called my daddy and he came and took me home. :) Anyways, my parents are awesome. :)

I also have 3 wonderful siblings! I love them so much! First there's Sami my younger sister, and even though we fight sometimes, I still love her and her really loud laugh. :) Then there's Mr. Levi a.k.a. Big Buba. My favorite freckle faced, brown eyed boy who, once he starts laughing cant stop. He gives great hugs and he knows his super heroes. I love him so much! <3 And finally there is Luke, a.k.a. Little Buba. He's so happy all the time, and when I'm not he finds a way to cheer me up. :)

I love my siblings and I  hope we stay close forever. <3

Now we move on to my 16 AWESOME aunts and uncles! My aunts and uncles are all so amazing! I am so thankful for all of their wonderful examples to me and all the love and support they have, and continue to show me. :) 

I couldn't post this without mentioning my cousins! All 39 of them :) They're all so fun to be around! I'm very thankful for them and the fun times I have had talking to them, babysitting them, and just goofing off with them. :) 

I'm also thankful for my grandparents. They have taught me so much, and I am really grateful for their great examples to me:) 

Lastly I would like to say how grateful I am for all of my ancestors who came before me. I wouldn't be here without them! Even though I haven't met most of them I am very grateful for everything they have done and taught me through their lives.

I love my family and I am so very grateful for all them! :) 

~Hannah~

30 Days of Thanksgiving ~ Day 1

Hey everyone! I have decided to post every day this month in honor of Thanksgiving! I have a lot to be grateful for and I want to share my gratitude with all of you! So stop by every day this month for a new post! ...Who knows!? You could get a shout out! :)

Starting Over

Oh my heck! I haven't blogged in almost a year! So here I am, and for the 4 of you who actually read/follow this blog...I hope you have noticed the new name (Infinite Happiness), web address (theperksofbeinghappy.blogspot.com), and design! :) I decided to do a complete over haul because I haven't blogged in almost a year and I'm starting over! (Hence the name of this post.)

Anyways I just wanted to say thanks for reading my blabber and I promise to post EVERY DAY this month! :)

~Hannah~